It’s 2003 and I’m back playing Snake 2 on my mobile

Posted: March 6, 2011 by connerscl in Features & Functions
Tags: , , , ,

by Clare Conway

thanks to stev.ie on flickr

I’ve had my phone stolen. By a crack addict gratecrasher with gold teeth. The crack bit isn’t an assumption – he was offering – and when I threw him out he took my smart phone and called me a racist. (Erroneous by all counts.)

Now I’m back on one of those Nokias – 3310, 2516… whatever. It’s rubbish and it’s cramping my mobile scope. For starters there’s no internet. Well there is, but it’s too slow to bother with. After ten minutes waiting for the homepage I gave up. The camera is lacking too. Its resolution is grainy and blurred and all colours merge into one – various shades of grey – to form looming shapes on the screen.

Last night I tried to take a photo of a public urinal. One of those new stand alone ones in Shoreditch. It was for another blog of mine about toilets – not a post-modern portrait of London. I had been searching for the thing for a while – looks like a plastic hedge – and when at last I caught sight of it, in all its piss-stained glory, I went in for a photo. And I snapped – a huge promising flash – and then nothing. The screen came out dark with a light grey triangle in the middle. At a stretch you’d call it an urban wigwam. But a stretch isn’t going to cut it. And anyway, it was meant to be a toilet. I’ll have to go back. But this time armed with something better. Suggestions would be wonderful, please.

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